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1.
The Turn 21:21
I Winter’s warning sinks deep into my bones As I carve my lonely way through unbroken snow Clouds cast their frozen crown to adorn my head As I lay these bones next to mine, upon the riverbed The Fall dreaming of what I’ve done Memories of guilt like Autumn’s crimson leaves The Spring weeping, in torrents of my shame Waiting light to crest the hill and burn my sins away Creeping over icy depths, an abyssal voice intones, Resonates through the glass and gallows-limbs above Breathing with lungs afire to thaw my tomb Here I will lie and wait as the wheel turns anew One last gleaming of what I’ve become Before the ice splits my reflection and pulls me down Before I am gone The stars gaze upon me, Condemning the path that I walk (With each passing day I lose more of myself) Fate has cast me Into this cruel reality, This mire of regret Where have I gone? Bring me around Stop the seasons, Before I found The violence within I wish to spend Another day among them Bring me around Stop the seasons Ageless roots from A tomb unbroken Bring me around Halt this madness Unyielding burden Cannot bear this II Hours sink like stones Turn like the tides Erode my essence And cast away my bones As I bleed away my past, Bleed away my memory, My deeds stain red the snow And make the wheel complete Once again I watch the past reprise How many years must I relive this? The burden of my guilt comes crushing down I cannot bear the weight I cannot bear this cycle Blade in my hand, Same as the night I cast away humanity and gave my life to spite I pour out an angel Into the white And pray for my destruction Release me from these binds Once again I’m staring eye to eye With the beast I gave existence Through the mirror lie enchanting depths below Hadean servant I will name thee: Murder! Abomination! We are one Again I've walked for miles To find this frozen stream Again I've peered into the icy flow To find the one interred below Again I reach the grave I made For the one I did betray Again I draw the blade, not-quite- Forgotten fear arising Each year I walk this wretched path And pray this time will be my last But knowing Judgment keeps me trapped Always on this cruel Möbius Reborn! The wheel will turn anew Reborn! Abysmal life renewed One more step across the threshold One more breath before I die Through the ice and through the water Take my place before the curtains rise Winter's prison holds me tight within her grasp This season of death will never leave my breast The sun's rays cast a halo on my unworthy head As I lay my weary bones in place upon the riverbed It will turn

about

A long walk through the snow at the beginning of a year that will never end.

"The Turn" is a song of time unending, of the slow turning of an immovable wheel, of the madness of inescapable guilt for a crime that cannot be spoken or imagined, against the self, against nature, against Being itself. It is the knowledge of violence that can never be undone and the horror of facing that violence unable to look away, unable to seek solace, or to ask forgiveness. It is at once the destruction of self, and the rejection of death, an escape into a cycle of renaissance extending until, or perhaps beyond, the death of time itself.

Writing for "The Turn" began on a day without snow, in late Spring. It has come to you now across two years, two continents, and four cities, to another day without snow, as the hemisphere bends its farthest from the sun. Its journey has not been a direct one, and its end was not always clear, but it is with great joy that I release this tale of horror and loss into the world. Thanks to all my friends and collaborators who made this piece possible, and particularly to Joe Kelleher and Jeremy Johnston for their amazing contributions.

forevernothingness.bandcamp.com

subcat.net

credits

released December 21, 2016

Special thanks to
Joe Kelleher (Forever Nothingness) - Guest vocals
Jeremy Johnston (SubCat Music Studios) - Mastering

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A God from the Machine Tallahassee, Florida

A metal project exploring the strange intersections between certainty and doubt, illusion and reality, and the gods we build to carry us through our lives.

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